I Get It Now

You thought I dropped it, the news that you feared would finally get out
That’s when I lost it, you knew I knew what you were about
I was the cover, the evidence to hide what seemed irrelevant
The fact that you weren’t into me was certainly okay with me
Your secrets, the truth, I so discovered when I saw your eyes
Focused on another and the other was a handsome guy
Stature, tall… in all I knew what you desired
When I turned to see his face I knew ole’ boy was even flier
Than you were, it should occur to you that I’m not like the others
So with you liking a dude, as long as I’m not his damn lover
I don’t care about your nature, that’s the will of the Creator
Told you that I understood, hard to be gay in the hood
Even harder in a college where your actions are admonished
And the colors that you wear, to then be out? You wouldn’t dare.
So I laughed in any faces that picked up upon the traces
Of your preference in gender, sex was never the intention
Sex was what you used to blanket you, and screw the chick protecting you
Me where? Doing, what? The truth was less dramatic
It’s not, like for years it wasn’t clear that you were in the closet
But you did it, told them lies, and yes, you landed them like flies
And yes, you threw me for a loop, and told me go along with you
But disrespect I couldn’t do, my rep was set til I hid you
And yes, I guess I had no clue that people will go after you
When you hit shit they couldn’t get, back hit the wall like cold cement
Their eyes turned cold upon a look, I guess a lie is all it took
For me to see life from your eyes, if you exposed your crude disguise
So now I get why you deserted me when I said it’s okay to be
Gay and lead the way for others practicing fraternity
Used to be concerning, through that struggle I was learning
It’s a pain to be the one with secrets in the corner, yearning
To be what your conscious needs, and now I understand, indeed
If they saw inside that closet would they understand the style?
Would they ask you where you got it? Would they frown or would they smile?
Guess I never saw it from your stance until I faced the crowd
Sometimes being who you are stands in the way of being proud
I get it now.

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